Bumper Taps FTW

People today need reality checks, in the form of bumper taps!
Like, take for instance my peeve with people who think they own a parking lot. And mind you, im not speaking of the guy in the escalade, or Dodge Ram truck...im speaking of pedestrians. I have countless times, almost ran over someone, not because of my incompetince, but because they just step right off the curb, and into the path of an oncomming car. Why? Because WE STOP! Just once, I would love to drive through a parking lot, have some cocky prick step in front of my car with that smug look on their face....just so I can hit them. Not maim, murder or run them over even, just tap them, in the shins with my bumper. I'll stop....but just a little shy. Oops...im sorry sir, maybe next time you'll think twice about walking into traffic, seeing as how this is a PARKING lot...and not a WALKING lot.
To the people who see my car pulling out of a parking space, and FLY behind me, blaring thier horn like im the idiot for backing up and almost hitting them....I'd like to bumper tap them!
To the people who cross in a crosswalk, see you're waiting for them to cross before you complete your turn....and take their time! Its like they walk as slowly as humanly possible, without even the slightest hint at a hurried pace...they need a bumper tap.
Bike riders, now dont get me wrong, they deserve to be on the road, go you for not polluting the air and being "green"...but ya know that lane, on the side of the road, with the little bike man in it...thats yours! You dont belong in MY lane!....bumper tap!
Even if we dont ever do it, the next time youre out in your car and someone pisses you off...just imagine the look on their face had you bumper tapped them....sometimes that alone makes it all worth it!