With almost 10 days remaining until the arrival of Riley, things are getting more "real" to me. I can't wait for her to be here, mostly in part to the fact I'm just done being pregnant. I know, I asked for it, and love that fact that it was able to happen.
But being off balance, having swollen feet, sore back, chronic exhaustion, stretch marks ( on top of the ones I already had) Bigger boobs ( which was DEFINITELY not on my bucket list) and the mind of an 80 - year old Alzheimer's patient....is the fine print of pregnancy no one speaks of. Like Voldemort, or Fight Club.
The first rule of pregnancy, is not to talk about pregnancy. Or "The fine print that shall not be named"
I know my life is about to change...drastically. No sleep, covered in spit up, changing diapers, late nights, early mornings, having to carry 10x my weight in car seat and diaper bag anytime I want to go out for a quick run to the store, cause God forbid, you be without ONE thing they may need! It'll all be worth it!
Today was Thanksgiving. I spent it with my family. Well...I live with my family, so it really wasn't any different than any other day in the house, except, the mood was different. Everyone was happy ( for the most part) there was no fighting ( again...for the most part) We did the traditional watching of the parade, and Football game, then waiting patiently for dinner to finally get to the table so we could scarf down all we could, in the smallest amount of time possible, leaving behind a schmorgazboard (yeah...YOU try to spell that one) of leftovers that we'll consume for weeks to come! And a lot of times I caught myself thinking
"The next Thanksgiving we have...we'll have a 11 month old" and it blew my mind. I can't wait to share family traditions with her, having her sit and get excited over the gigantic balloons in the parade! Teaching her to scream "Touchdown" at all the wrong times, but that's ok, cause it'll be adorable and no one will care. Filling her plate to the brim with food and watching her make the mess, of all messes with the mashed potatoes, getting marshmallow's (from the candied yams) in her hair, smearing cranberry sauce all over her high chair!
And the tradition will carry on, onto the next day, where we head downtown for the annual Tree Lighting Ceremony in Pioneer Courthouse Square! It's so much fun ( when there isn't a terrorist threat of a bomb ) to watch the choir sing Xmas carols, to see the kids' eyes light up when Santa gets on stage and tells all the boys and girls he's happy to see them there. Leading all the way into the countdown to the tree lighting! It's freezing, usually raining, packed full of people, but....it's fun. And it's a tradition, that I can't wait to share with a new member of our family!
This is the time of year when you start to think about money, mainly because you want to buy gifts for people. And although, that's not what the true meaning of the season is...it means a lot to me, to be able to see people open gifts I give them on Xmas morning. With the baby coming, I know things are going to be super tight, more so than they are now. But I know, she'll have the basic things that a child needs ( diapers, a place to sleep, food, clothing) and she'll have some not so basic, but well needed things that a child needs as well ( tons of love, a big sister who can't wait until she can teach her things, and be a part of her life, loads of memories, etc..) and for that...I am thankful.
Thank you to all my friends and family, that have come through for us. I know we brought this upon ourselves ( as we've been told, it wasn't wise to choose to have a baby in the situation we're in) but ya know what...at least at this point, I know who my true friends are. The ones that don't judge, the ones that are standing by us, and helping where they can with what they can. Everything ( even the smallest gesture) is greatly appreciated, and will be used with love, and thanks.